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Executive Leasing: Executive, former lease model, one previous careful owner, normal wear and tear, seeks new home…


Executive leasing – What, who, when, how and sometimes why? I leased a car once. I think it was because there were tax advantages or because it was better to treat it as operational expenditure rather than capital or maybe it was because the dashboard navigation computer’s voice was Scarlett Johansson. Do we make executive leasing decisions the same way? That new manager you contracted for accounts payable with the MBA – not only has he improved productivity and slashed costs but he’s also got the voice of Scarlett Johansson! Double-plus whammy right there. No?

I suppose one of the foundation beliefs underlying the desirability of executive leasing is that management is management is management and it doesn’t really matter if what you’re managing is insurance sales, museum curating or nuclear power generation. If you screw up nuclear power generation then your workplace may end up as a museum (in 140 years) and you’ll certainly need insurance so maybe there are benefits to overlapping knowledge there. You can delegate specific technical tasks to experts and focus on those universal people leadership thingies that you’ve convinced multiple people that you’re an expert in. Or you might be a practitioner of some acronymmed discipline that applies in any industry like HR, PR or BS. (And if you cannot distinguish between HR, PR and BS, then perhaps you really are management material.)

I recently MC’d a series of award shows for the Dairy Industry. At black tie dinners, dairy trainees, farm managers and sharemilkers in full black tie regalia received well deserved acclaim for jobs well done and single-handedly saving our nation’s economy. (The Swandri company really need to come out with a tuxedo. Give me a call. I can hook you up with a market.)

I am a townie and must admit if there are two words I don’t want to see together in a sentence I hear at my house, those two words are “milk solids.” (Unlike dairy farmers who might see the words “milk solids” but hear the words “white gold,” which appropriately enough was the theme of their events.) My point is that every industry and workplace has its own very specific jargon and psyche. I’m not rejecting the concept of executives flitting about the place but one of the disadvantages is that they need to get up to speed with the language of where they’ve arrived at. Or maybe this is an advantage? I’d think about it some more but I’m not feeling too well as I can’t get “milk solids” out of my mind.

I read an article on about some non-English words that the English language desperately needs. Some cultures just have a different view of the world and their language and vocabulary has developed some insights from which we could benefit. That’s as true of workplace cultures as it is of languages. A definite benefit of executive leasing is the short-term lesser-risk injection of fresh perspective, processes and ideas, challenging the status quo and sacred cows.

Sure your leased executives aren’t going to add value instantly with great words like the Georgian “Shemomedjamo,” meaning to eat beyond the point of being completely full just because you can, or the Tibetan “Gadrii Nombor Shulen Jongu,” meaning giving an answer unrelated to the question. Frankly, in today’s business world, if you can master Gadrii Nombor Shulen Jongu, then you are destined for a salary package that will enable you and your family to shemomedjamo to your heart’s content. (And by “content,” I mean “demise.)

What’s that right on the tip of your tongue – that’s right – bacon! And also on the tip of your tongue is a question – how else is executive leasing like leasing a car?

That car I said I leased – on returning it, the dealer inspected it because they were going to re-sell it. It needed to be in ‘reasonable’ condition for a three year old vehicle. At some point I, or one of my ‘friends,’ had opened a door onto a slope in such a way that a tiny corner of the driver’s door had been snapped off. I’d never noticed it but the inspector did notice it like it was a $1000 noticeable thing. If I’m milking this analogy of executive leasing compared to car leasing, then there should definitely be an end-of-lease inspection and the poor old executive should be returned in a reasonable condition. Who knows what might have snapped during their employment with you?





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